tari_roo: Dean (Dean lips bw)
[personal profile] tari_roo
Undercover Maths (SGA/SPN)

Author: me

Disclaimer: The usual

Summary: for dolimir_k's prompt on the Ficlet meme fill. She wanted: Marine!Dean has been assigned to protect Rodney. The kid is smarter than he looks and intrigues the scientist.

AN: AU for SPN (Marine!Dean with no explanation as to why and how)

sga*spn*sga*spn


“You! Over here, now!”

Rodney snapped his fingers at some random Marine and stared at his tablet. The equations weren’t quite making sense, something was off.

“You snapped, sir?”

Without looking up, McKay motioned to his right and said, “Stand over there... no there! Yes, good.” The bulk of the jarhead was enough to block the overly harsh rays of the alien sun overhead. In the newly created shade, the tablet screen was more visible and hopefully the equations would start making more sense again.

Seconds ticked by and Rodney frowned, tapping the screen of the tablet in irritation, wishing for a pen and paper. “You forgot to carry the one.”

Huffing, Rodney snapped, “This isn’t remedial long division, Private, its...”

An audacious finger, knuckle scabbed and red, interrupted him by tapping the relevant section of the equation and Rodney’s ire at being interrupted by a moron, morphed into embarrassed indignation (mostly at himself). Private Moron was right.

“Shit!” Rodney exclaimed and made the correction, scowling fiercely at the result – which was now making sense. “Son of a ...”

“You’re welcome, sir.”

The Private’s tone, all smug and pleased, had Rodney turning his baleful glare from screen to Marine. Ridiculous lips, fine profile and were those... freckles? “What? Are you some MIT reject that failed dismally to get into NASA and joined the army and lucked out with the Stargate programme?”

Private Ridiculous Lips smiled, “Something like that, sir. And it’s Sergeant Winchester.”

Glaring more, if that was possible, moving the burn from scorching to nuclear, Rodney humphed, “Winchester, really? Isn’t that a little... ironic, or karmic, or something?”

“I don’t know what you mean, sir.”

“Sure, sure,” McKay muttered, returning the nuclear glare to the tablet screen and exclaiming, “So, MIT flunk out or not?”

“Not, sir.”

“Idiot savant?”

“If you say so, sir.”

“Lucky guess?”

“Probably, sir.”

“Mensa member?”

“Hell no, sir.”

Rodney pursed his lips, looked up in mock dismay, his ire over the equation gone, but the mystery of the genius Marine far more intriguing, or in this case, annoying. “Closet jock mathlete who never applied himself and thinks it’s funny getting one over on the geeks?”

Sergeant Winchester’s smile was iridescent and McKay rolled his eyes, “Got it in one, sir.”

“Enough with all the ‘sirring’ its getting on my nerves,” McKay grumbled.

“Yes, sir.”

“Ok, ok, smarty pants. Let’s go – prime or not prime. 86549987?”

sga*spn*sga*spn


“Colonel, sir?’

Sheppard looked up from his PSP at Lieutenant Marks and quirked an eyebrow of query.

“Dr McKay is badgering my Marines again. Well, just one this time,” Marks replied but didn’t seem too upset. In fact, he looked downright pleased with himself and that worried Sheppard. Twisting on the log so he could check on McKay, who was supposed to be figuring out how to get the DHD to dial home remotely from his tablet. Judging by McKay’s expression, a familiar one, the one he got when he’d found something really interesting in a completely unexpected place, there was no work being done on DHD remote activation.

Sighing, Sheppard hauled himself up, sharing an amused look with Marks. “Somehow I think it’s less badgering and more recruiting, huh, Marks?”

“Either way, Colonel, I’m concerned.”

Snorting, John shook his head, “I totally buy that.”

As Sheppard approached, Rodney’s strident vocal aerobics became understandable and it seemed it wasn’t so much an argument, but a debate over ‘pure’ mathematics vs applied.

“There is no way in hell that Batman could actually create a grappling hook with the strength to support his, Robin’s and the Joker’s weight!” McKay was waving his hands around, tablet forgotten on the ground, an errant wrapper from a powerbar fluttering in the blue grass. Stretching down, Sheppard caught the paper and buried a smile as Sergeant Winchester replied, “Dude, he’s Batman. Of course he can.”

Flapping hands nearly hit Sheppard, who stepped back in time, as Rodney exclaimed, “What did I just say about tensile strength and the pure goddamn physics of it all!”  

Winchester though had realised that his CO was in earshot of any further debate and nodded at Sheppard even as he said, “You also said Superman would kill Lois if he caught her in mid-flight and clearly he doesn’t. Sir.”

McKay, oblivious to their mini-audience, went red in the face and exclaimed, “In reality, he would! Man of Steel! Soft human flesh! Meet in mid-air! Basic physics!”

“Rodney?” Sheppard decided to interject before McKay launched into the whole ‘Flash would be naked all the time’ theory for the umpteenth time. “What?” Rodney spluttered, whirling on Sheppard. John just stared at him, eyebrow raised Teal’c style and McKay bristled for a moment, before deflating. “Fine, fine, back to work.” McKay picked up his tablet, glared some more at Sheppard and muttered, “Damn slave driver...”

Satisfied, Sheppard shot Winchester a warning look too, but the Sergeant seemed unrepentant, judging by his grin. “And Rodney, stop using my Marines as sunshades.”

Rodney’s reply was non-verbal and in a comic book, a literal death ray. As Marks ordered Winchester back to watching the perimeter, Sheppard heard him say sotto, meant only for Winchester, “What did I say about getting the geeks all riled up, Winchester?”

“Not to, sir.”

“Well?”

“Couldn’t help it, sir.”

McKay, the faker, was pretending not to listen in too, and nearly choked on his own spit when Winchester concluded, “He was going to send us back to Atlantis in itty bitty pieces, sir”

“I was not!” McKay reported, eyes bugging out, just a little.

Unphased by the diminutive balding fury, Winchester turned and deadpanned, “You 100% sure of that, Dr McKay?”

Surprisingly enough, McKay actually checked his tablet, scowled, tapped an app and then paled as the old equation rolled by. Stammering in denial, Rodney sputtered, “I would have figured it out before we actually went through again!” McKay shot Sheppard a worried, sheepish glance and John sighed, and pressed his hand into his eyes.

“Marks?”

“Yes, sir?”

“Leave Winchester here. Winchester?”

“Yes, sir?”

“Wrangle him for me, please.”

“I do not need ‘wrangling!’”

“My pleasure, sir.”

Sheppard left the stormy cloud of hellbent ire behind with its strapping hidden genius and went back to his log. Normally he would have stayed and kept Rodney on track and away from altering wormhole theory, but he was so tired, they’d probably end up rewiring the Stargate for HBO, or something.

“Wipe that ridiculous smirk off your face, Winchester! And Sheppard, don’t think I’ll forget this!”

Sheppard wasn’t scared, ... not really. Ok, maybe a little.

Fin


Date: 2011-08-15 11:57 am (UTC)
jebbypal: (Default)
From: [personal profile] jebbypal
lmao!! oh boy. I really needed that. about the only thing that would be funnier would be John Winchester trying to wrangle Radek and Rodney as they debated the metaphysics of the attacking ghosts...

Date: 2011-08-15 12:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] auntmo9.livejournal.com
Is that a subtle, sly prompt on your part? I'd read that fic....

Date: 2011-08-15 12:46 pm (UTC)
jebbypal: (Default)
From: [personal profile] jebbypal
If the bunny takes root, I won't complain...

Date: 2011-08-15 01:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
wait, what??? O.o

This is not a free for all, people! *points Rodney's fingers at you both*

I refuse to be inspired!

Date: 2011-08-15 03:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] auntmo9.livejournal.com
A Rodney finger, really? I'm so nottrembling in my boots....but that is okay of your aren't inspired ;)

*wanders off to go help Dean poke another greasy hair git tiger*

Date: 2011-08-15 08:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
\o/ greasy haired git \o/

Date: 2011-08-16 12:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] auntmo9.livejournal.com
I hope it lives up to your expectations...it is done and posted...

Date: 2011-08-16 06:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Oh, oh it did :)

Thanks poppet!

Date: 2011-08-16 12:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] auntmo9.livejournal.com
You are welcome :)

Date: 2011-08-16 02:20 am (UTC)
jebbypal: (ff trap)
From: [personal profile] jebbypal
*bats eyes innocently*

I earned the nickname of "devilwoman, thrower of bunnies" honestly. Sorry.

Date: 2011-08-16 06:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Hmmmm... if only I'd known before... sigh.

Right, and your Mal icon is too cute! :)

Date: 2011-08-15 12:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] auntmo9.livejournal.com
This was great...you gotta love Dean, in any capacity, needling the likes of Rodney!

*runs off to finish her own prompt*

Date: 2011-08-15 12:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Thanks, as usual :) *ambles off to finish the Quantum leap one* :)

Date: 2011-08-15 12:50 pm (UTC)
saphirablue: (Dean)
From: [personal profile] saphirablue
Holy cow! This is awesome!

Your Rodney and Dean voice is perfect! One sentence in and I could hear the two of them "debating" and Dean pointing out the mistakes? Great!

Also this sentence: “And Rodney, stop using my Marines as sunshades.” *bawahahahah* *wipes tears*

Thank you very much for this fic! :)

Date: 2011-08-15 01:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
:)

I can't seem to stop annoying Rodney via Dean... its just ... awesome! :)

Thanks m'dear

Date: 2011-08-15 01:03 pm (UTC)
leesa_perrie: two cheetahs facing camera and cuddling (Rodney Stop Calling Me)
From: [personal profile] leesa_perrie
LOL! I don't watch Supernatural, but I still loved this!! :D

“Leave Winchester here. Winchester?”

“Yes, sir?”

“Wrangle him for me, please.”

“I do not need ‘wrangling!’”

“My pleasure, sir.”


Rodney wrangling - it's a necessary skill for all Atlantis marines!!! And as for Rodney using the marines as sunshades and Sheppard's comment about it, totally cracked me up too!! :D :D :D
Edited Date: 2011-08-15 01:05 pm (UTC)

Date: 2011-08-15 01:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
I love your icon! :)

I figured Rodney would consider the Marines handy for many things - paper weights, wind shelters, manual labour, etc.

Thanks for the comment! :)

Date: 2011-08-15 01:31 pm (UTC)
leesa_perrie: two cheetahs facing camera and cuddling (Rodney Stop Calling Me)
From: [personal profile] leesa_perrie
The icon was made by [livejournal.com profile] xafirah - I wish it had been one of mine!! :D

I figured Rodney would consider the Marines handy for many things - paper weights, wind shelters, manual labour, etc.

LOL!! Yep, that sounds like Rodney!!! :D :D

Date: 2011-08-15 06:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] spn-2008.livejournal.com
Looooved it!, perfect!, smart!Dean is always fun :D

Date: 2011-08-15 08:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
He is, isn't he :)

Thanks!

Date: 2011-08-15 09:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kriadydragon.livejournal.com
Heee! Cute :D

Date: 2011-08-16 06:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Thanks :)

esp for the prompt idea :)

Date: 2011-08-15 10:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dolimir-k.livejournal.com
I loved it! Perfect, just perfect!!!

Course, I want more...teehee!

Thank you for writing my prompt!!!

Date: 2011-08-16 06:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
You are most welcome, m'dear - it was a great prompt!

More? O.o

Date: 2011-08-16 12:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darkestnight12.livejournal.com
Smart!Dean on par with McKay is so full of win! Gah! *fangirls*

Date: 2011-08-16 06:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
*evil grin* Its my second flavour of Dean - smartass!actuallysmart!Dean :)

Thanks! (as always :))

Date: 2011-08-16 02:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] catangel70.livejournal.com
smart Dean = L.U.V and irritating McKay with his super math skills priceless!!

Date: 2011-08-16 06:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Yeah, I seem to like irratating McKay - poor guy (snort)

Thanks! :)

Date: 2011-08-16 03:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ekkentros.livejournal.com
Absolutely pure gold!! Rodney and Dean snark is always awesome on levels!! Gotta love the applied vs pure math debates. "Because he's Batman" is a totally valid answer *snerk*

Thanks for the smile! :D

Date: 2011-08-16 06:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
It's a valid answer for most things :)

You are most welcome! :)

Date: 2011-08-16 06:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] iyalode.livejournal.com
Hee! I think the joy in this is Dean's total inability to be intimidated by Rodney' brain. He'd count the cutting sarcasm as a fun bonus.

Some people play RPGs, Dean plays RTG (Rile the Geek) to pass the time.

Date: 2011-08-16 06:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Oh totally! Its his fav past time with a Geekosaur of a brother. And at least Rodney isn't Sam-sized and able to pound him into the floor, hence the appeal I think.

Ah, Dean. How we love you! :)

Date: 2011-08-17 05:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cimmerdeux.livejournal.com
Wonderful little fic. I love Marine Dean, actually either or both of the Winchesters in Atlantis but Dean, especially smart Dean is a real pleasure. He's the perfect man for the job of Rodney wrangling. Thanks very much.

Date: 2011-08-17 08:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Strangely enough, me too! Love any version of military Dean and throw him into Atlantis? Well.. bonus!

You are most welcome, thank you for the comment!

Date: 2011-08-17 06:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anifsemaj.livejournal.com
Oh, this was beautiful!

Date: 2011-08-17 08:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Why, thank you very much!

Date: 2011-08-19 12:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] e313.livejournal.com
pure awesome! :D

Date: 2011-08-19 07:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Why thank you! :)

Date: 2011-08-19 07:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shirowolf.livejournal.com
Smart snarky Dean is one of my favorite! Lovely XD

Date: 2011-08-19 10:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Me too! Thanks, appreciate the feedback.

Date: 2011-11-05 03:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nati-a.livejournal.com
Dunno how I ended up here at your journal, but I think it was a link off a SPN comment meme. Anyway, I ended up checkin this ficlet out as well, and OMG, I loved it. I can just see Dean drivin Rodney up th friggin wall! Awesome. I'd love to see more of this AU.

Date: 2011-11-05 10:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Well, glad you made it :) and even more glad that you enjoyed this ficlet too :) I have a thing for Marine!Dean (as might be apparent)

There may be more, just not any time soon.

Thanks again

Date: 2013-01-17 08:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jpgr.livejournal.com
I love this story every time I rediscover it. Have you written any further in this verse? I don't know, maybe Rodney and Dean get trapped somewhere in the course of wrangling and Rodney continues to try and solve the puzzle that is Sgt Winchester.

Date: 2013-01-20 03:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tari-roo.livejournal.com
Hey, thanks for the comment. And funny you should ask - I do have a half-complete mini ficlet in this verse which go lost in the WIP folder. Maybe I should dust it off?

Thanks!

Date: 2013-01-20 06:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jpgr.livejournal.com
I'm sure you'd make many happy :)

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